Whose Rights Are They, Really?

Being a teacher who has to give real letter grades on report cards for the first time in 14 years has really been difficult.  What do these grades really mean?  It seems that no matter what grades I give, they are not a true representation of every child.  When I give one student an A who always works above grade level, does that mean the same thing as the A I give the student who's work I modify every day? 

It also turns out that I'm quite a sucker.  For some reason I gave the students who have regular behavior problems a B in citizenship.  Of course, they don't deserve a B, but what grade do they deserve?  In my frustration, I told my husband, "I'm just going to give everyone a C!  They can all be average!"

This got me thinking.  Don't we teach children that we are all average these days?  We don't teach our children that putting your best effort and working hard are important.  We teach them that we are all "equal".  We all have the same opportunities, the same chance to go to college, the same chance to be successful.  What a load of crap!

Those of you who know me know that I am pretty liberal, and this blog may surprise some of you, but I'm tired of this passivist attitude.

My first experience as a parent with this new way of thinking was when my children signed up for softball/t-ball as young children.  After each game, my children asked me who won.  Um, I don't know, we don't keep score.  At the end of the season, everyone got a trophy.  EVERYONE GOT A FRIGGING TROPHY!!  What are we teaching these kids?  If you sit around and watch the bunnies, you get a stupid, meaningless trophy? 

Next was the science fair, which I help run at our school.  We couldn't do first, second and third place anymore because we might hurt someone's feelings.  We will simply buy a different ribbon for the kids who get to go to the regional fair.  WHAT??!!  If you put the most effort and did the best project, you deserve the shiny blue ribbon!  You earned that ribbon!

Now that I think about it, not only do we not reward the "good" children, the hard working children, but we reward those children who regularly get in trouble.  The ones who need to learn to make better choices.  My daughter is a straight A student who NEVER gets in trouble.  She also has not received the "Principal's Award" in 2 1/2 years.  The students who get into trouble regularly sure have earned it, though.  What are we teaching these children?  Follow the rules and you will be ignored.  Break the rules, cause problems and we will jump at your command, give you a hug when you hit someone and give you a sticker when you remember to say thank you. 

Frankly, I'm sick and tired of this attitude.  I am sick and tired of students taking away from my children's learning.  I'm tired of children being able to hurt another child "because he has a disability and he has rights".  What about my child's rights?

My dream job would be to open a school where only children who want to learn can come.  You hurt other children, talk back, get violent?  See ya!  Imagine what I could do.  I could take these children on the most amazing field trips because I would know they wouldn't cause problems, get hurt or embarrass me.  I could teach them so much more without the distractions.  I could teach them to teach themselves.  I could become the facilitator, not the teacher.  I could have amazing results.

I know the new idea is to send every student to college, make every student average.  Imagine our lives in an average world.  Who would cure cancer?  Who would start the path to world peace?  Who would make my damn french fries at McDonald's?  I like those french fries.

What Really is Important in Life?

I had one of the scariest nights ever tonight.  My good friend's son was missing...for three hours.  It was so horrible and I felt so helpless.  Thankfully, he was found safe and sound.  It really makes you think, however. 

This sweet boy is only eight years old.  He walked out of school and hadn't been seen since.  Jered happened to be at school and as soon as we heard the office do an all-call for him, we walked around the outside of the school.  Nowhere.  We went inside and found out that he was not on the school bus or at home.  That's when panic started to set in, but just a bit.  We have children go "missing" all the time.  They are always found within thirty minutes at a friend's house.  This boy was missing for three hours!  That never, ever happens.  After the first hour, you start to think that maybe things won't go so well.  When it starts getting dark and rainy, you really start to panic.  I found myself searching empty fields for this child, my friend's child.  What if I would have found something horrible?  I can't even bare to think of it.

I can't begin to explain the support that showed up for this family.  Not knowing what else to do, I put his picture on my Facebook page and started texting his picture to everyone I know locally.  People replied immediately.  Friends who don't even know the child or his family came to the school to help canvass the neighborhood.  Teachers came back to school, on a Friday night, to help look for him.  School police, office staff, sheriff.  This boy was GOING to be found.

Thankfully, he was found at a friend's house.  There had been a miscommunication about what was supposed to happen after school.  I am so happy to report a happy ending to my story.

But this story made me think.  What if we didn't find him?  How would that change things?  My friend's life?  My life?  Suddenly my dirty house, my bills, my stresses in life seem so....so petty.  Really, what matters in life?  My family, my friends, my children and my amazing community matter.  I am still so overwhelmed and humbled by the support we received tonight.  People who don't even know them dropped everything, on a Friday night, when they really just wanted to go home and rest, to find this child.  And they don't regret a second of it.

That's what's important in life.  This amazing, wonderful life.

The Road to Healthy Living

I've been trying to make better choices lately.  Trying to eat better and get more exercise.  However, it seems as if the world is working against me!

This past week I have had something to do EVERY day.  Most of the things involve food.  Why is it that when we get together with friends or family we don't serve fruit or vegetables?  It's always fried, battered, sugary junk.  It's very difficult to be on a weight loss journey and be around....people.  I know, I know, it's all about will power.  Turns out I have none.  I can walk right past that chocolate cake, no worries; but put a plate of chicken wings in front of me and you better just get the heck out of the way because I will eat them.  All of them.  And if your fingers get in the way, I just might eat those, too.

I went back to work on Monday after having two weeks off.  Sunday, I told myself, "Self, you are going to the gym tomorrow at 6:00am."  Sunday night, I was still not in bed at 11:00.  Monday morning, I told myself, "I'll start tomorrow, for sure."  I didn't get home until after 10:00.  Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday were all the same.  Turns out I can talk myself out of going bed early just so I don't have to get up early and go to the gym.  I'm hoping to get to the gym today because once I get there, I'm usually pretty good at going regularly.  Except for the fact that we are supposed to go meet one of my husband's out of town friends today, have to take Gwen around to sell Girls Scout cookies and have another child spending the night at our house tonight.  See, I can make an excuse for anything.

So, I'll keep trying to better myself.  Maybe one of these days I'll actually be able to talk myself INTO it instead of OUT of it.

If you'll excuse me, breakfast is ready.  My husband make fried eggs, sausage and hashbrowns.  Oi Vey!

I Don't Believe in New Year's Resolutions

So, we are almost two weeks into 2012 and people keep asking me what my New Year's resolutions are.  I don't believe in New Year's resolutions.  I have learned that for me, New Year's resolutions are just a set up for failure.  I can't logically set a resolution for myself that I'm going to stick with for 365 days just because it's January 1st. 

I have, however, set some personal goals for myself.  Not resolutions, but things I would like to do to better myself.  Not for a year, but for life. 

One goal I have set is to spend more time outside with my kids, especially on break.  I've found that it's so easy to spend time cleaning my house during break (and who doesn't love a clean house?), but while I'm inside cleaning my house, my kids are inside watching TV, playing video games, you get the picture.  So, luckily for us, winter break was amazing.  The weather was so nice, we were outside almost every day.  We went on walks around the Marina, went on bike rides, spent time together.  This was one of those breaks that I will never forget.  I've learned that although my house isn't spotless, the dirt will be there another day.  My kids have grown so much.  I don't want to regret cleaning my house instead of playing with my kids.  I don't want my kids to say that their mom was too busy cleaning the house to play with them. 

So, this is my promise to myself and my kids.  Not for a year, but forever.  I will never, ever put cleaning the house before playing with you again.  Really, I'm the only person who notices the dust on the table.  Some day, I'm going to miss the days that I didn't have time to keep the house spotless.

Am I Going to Do This?

Hi.  So, this is my first real attempt at a blog.  You know, because I have nothing better to do in my spare time. 

So, I am a mother to two amazing children.  I am the co-leader for my daughter's Girl Scout troop and to my son's Cub Scout troop.  I am also a wife and a third grade teacher.  Sometimes I forget how lucky I am.  Then I read my friend's Facebook posts or the news and realize that although my life isn't perfect, I do live a pretty charmed life.  My husband loves me (like for real, not like on TV).  My children are absolutely amazing (I'll save that for another day).  I have a great job (sometimes it doesn't feel like it, but I really do).  I own a nice home (maybe not my dream home, but it'll do).  I don't really NEED anything.  Of course, there are things I want, but I really have every thing I need.

So, that's me.  I'll add details later.  I'm not sure if I'm interesting enough that anyone will read it, but I think it's interesting enough to write about it.  This is certainly not going to end like Julie and Julia, but maybe someone will care enough to follow me.  Maybe.